Sunday, June 28, 2015

Sinful Sunday: Skirt and Stockings

By no stretch do I consider myself a crossdresser, but there is something very sexy about dressing in the finest attire of females.  The feeling of a short skirt, stockings, or knee high socks, and a soft or silky blouse is my idea of heaven.

I've done this most of my life, and despite the efforts of some to try to break that desire, it's not going anyway any time soon.

Sunday, May 24, 2015

The Tale of an Awkward Man Losing His Virginity. Awkwardly.

One of the most difficult things about being a male virgin in high school was hearing all of your friends talk about getting laid regularly and how being a virgin was a sign of mental retardation.  When most of your peers say it, you tend to believe it.  Going through all of high school without one single date, it’s safe to say, I was absolutely a virgin.

Not surprisingly, I didn’t lose my virginity until I was 20 years old.  I simply couldn’t find a woman who was willing enough to be my first.  Every time I would date a girl in college, my virginity would come up in conversation.  The answer was always, always, always, “I’m sorry, but I can’t bear the responsibility of being your first.”

For the last six months of 1999, I dated this girl “J” in what was a sexless relationship.  Why was it sexless?  Read the paragraph above.  She just couldn’t take the pressure of being my first, but it was okay because I had no other options at the time and I legitimately felt like it was the best I would ever do.

The day finally came (no pun intended) after one of the most heartbreaking experiences of my life.  It was New Years Eve 1999 into 2000.  The world was supposedly ending, so the partying was extra crazy.  “J” and I were invited to my friend’s big end-of-the-world bash.  Well, one hour into the party, I walked in on J and my best friend committing various acts of foreplay.  She zipped her pants up and ran out of the house with a huge grin on her face.  I’ll never forget it.  It was devastating, but I was so used to being devastated, that I just shook my head and said “typical.”

Later that night, well after the ball dropped in Times Square, a girl I never met before, and haven’t seen since, decided to befriend me.  I think she felt sorry for me and put herself out for me that night.  The sex was atrocious.  Absolutely atrocious.  No passion, no feeling, just a hook up that will live on as my first time.  In reality, she was probably just horny and needed some release.  Who could blame her?  It was a very sexually charged night, as New Years Eve tends to be.  But she never once asked me if I was a virgin, and I never once told her I was.

One year later, when I was 21, I met the girl I would have my first real relationship with.  She asked me if I was a virgin, to which I said “no, I’ve been with one other girl.”  She then replied with “Good, because if you were, I wouldn’t date you.  No offense, I just don’t need that pressure.”  Selfish, but true.

So I guess I should really be thankful for that god-awful, terrible, no-good experience.  It was the catalyst to what became who I am today.  So, thank you, girl I don’t know!  I hope I was what you needed that night.

Wednesday, May 13, 2015

My Bisexuality and Me

So I haven't blogged in a while.  It's been a really bad last few months, so writing has been the last thing on my mind.  I don't have a whole lot of time, so I'll be fairly quick with this one.

Aside from the turmoil surrounding my life (which I will gladly get into another day) I've been trying to come to terms with my inner demons.  It's been a struggle.  I didn't think it would be so difficult to accept bisexuality.  Not everyone is okay with it (as expected), but beyond that, it's just a hell of a lifestyle change.  I feel like it's no one's business but mine.  I don't want anyone to stand up for me, I don't want anyone to feel sorry for me, hell, I don't want anyone to accept me.  I'm just tired of living an uphill battle and being forced to suffer for it.

I almost flunked out of grade school because I had a teacher who suspected I was gay and tried to fuck my grades.  So needless to say, I've tried to be a man, but I'm not enough of one to pretend that I am one.  I get mocked non-stop for it, but it's still a fight I truly believe is worth fighting for.  I will be myself, well, as much as I can.

Monday, March 2, 2015

TMI Tuesday: Downright Sexy!!

1. Have you ever had sex in three or more positions in one session? Name the positions.
Constantly.  I usually go back from forth from bottom, to top, to side, to bottom, to top.  I never stay still.  I don't know where I will end up when I cum.  I hope it's somewhere different every time.

2. Have you ever had sex continuously for more than an hour? Was it all intercourse or other methods of sexual pleasure?
When I was in college, I wore a pair of silk panties to class one time and one time only.  I was so horny from the experience, I came home and masturbated for about six hours straight.  I could never repeat that, but it was fun when it happened.

3. Have you ever planned and devoted an entire day to sex and sexual activity (with breaks for eating, etc)?
No I don't have that kind of attention span.  I've planned full evenings around sex marathons, but never a whole day.

4. Have you ever been so loud having sex that housemates/neighbors commented or complained?
Yup.  I hit all her right spots apparently :-)

5. Have you ever had your sexual technique/style/skill openly praised by someone?
I just think I'm an overall beast in the bedroom.  No one part of me stands out.  Well, that one part of me does...

6. Have you ever gotten really turned on by saying or hearing dirty talk?
I dirty talk all the time.  Yes, it gets me turned on like you wouldn't believe.

Bonus: What word or words said during sex totally turn you off or distract you from the task at hand?
I get really turned off when people use technical terms or silly terms during sex.  Please do not refer to what is entering you as a penis.  It is not a winkie.  It is either a cock or a dick.

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Monday, February 23, 2015

TMI Tuesday: Hook-ups

1. When was your last hook-up?
It's been quite some time since my last hook-up, at least a few years.  I'm more of a commitment-with-sex kind of guy.  

2. Briefly describe the hook-up?
She was a girl I met at a coffee shop.  We both just got out of long relationships, and had a lot to talk about.  Once she started ranting about hating pants, I knew exactly what this was going to be.

3. How did you feel physically and emotionally after your last hook-up?
Fine.  No feelings at all.  Moreso with her, I think.  We were safe, safe, safe, so I had nothing to worry about.

4. Are you still acquainted with the person from your hook-up?
No, although we aren't friends at all, I do wish her well.

5. How often do you engage in hook-ups?
It's rare.  I just don't have the confidence for it.  I get feelings way too easily.

6. What do you like most about engaging in hook-ups?
The spontaneity of it all.  The fact that anything can happen quickly and you just don't know exactly what will happen.  Of course, I also am very careful, so that's quite a buzz kill.

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